A beautiful baby boy

I'm sure the majority, if not all, knew Scott and I had our baby. We welcomed the most beautiful, perfect, amazing baby to this world August 17, 2013 at 10:58am. Ryker Kay Nelson weighed 8lbs 5oz and was 21.5in long.

 Friday, August 16th was my last day of work before I went on maternity leave. I had been having sparatic contractions on and off throughout the day, but they weren't anything to be desired. I said my goodbyes to coworkers at 4 and headed off to my mom to get the dogs. I stayed at her house till 5 or so because Scott was working, and on my way home I had 2 or 3 really strong, serious business contractions. I kept thinking I didn't want to get my hopes up, so I continued on. By the third one, I had seriously wondered if I shouldn't have stayed in pocatello. The drive from my moms house to mine is 30 minutes. So I get home and something tells me to grab the baby book, camcorder and something else and put them in the car. I called Scott to tell him I was having really real contractions according to to info he and I had gotten from our birthing classes. I can't even tell you what time he got home, I tried fixing dinner and eating once he did, but I couldn't even finish I was in so much pain - a lot of it back labor.

I "Officially" started counting contractions at 8pm. They weren't anything serious, time wise or length, but by 9:30pm I called L&D and asked what their opinion was, I think by then contractions were 5-10 minutes apart, lasting about 30-45 seconds. The nurse suggested I labor at home for a little longer and use an exercise ball. I tried the ball, but was in so much agony, I couldn't sit. I ended up using the walls of our bedroom for support and swaying my hips side to side. Scott had to go to work that Friday at 4am and was so exhausted so I let him sleep for an hour. But at 11:30pm, contractions were 45-60 seconds long and every 5 minutes. I didn't want to press my luck and have a baby on the side of the road, so I woke Scott and just said "it's time to go". The poor guy was in panick mode, he started running around getting dressed and getting the dogs ready to go (they went to my moms) and finally got me in the car. Laboring for 30 minutes in the car was awful. I had adeath grip o. The door handle and Scott's arm and I cried the entire way there. I remember thinking, I better to be a 6 for all this pain...

 We checked into the hospital at 12:30am. When we were walking in, Scott really was basically carrying me, I kept telling him I was sick, like I wanted to throw up. But at the time I never did. We got up to our room, got changed and hooked up to monitors when I started puking my guts out. I was in such physical pain, it was making me sick. That was great, projectile vomiting and going to contractions.. Let me tell ya! Ugh. I really thought I wanted to do a natural labor, but by the time I got to the hospital, I knew I wanted an epidural. When the attending OB came in, I almost died when he said I was only to a 4. Really?! All this pain, and I'm only a 4?! Kill me now.

By the time I got my epidural - let me just break right here and say praise God to whom ever it was that invented that miracle drug! I had heard that it hurt, sometimes was difficult to get in, bla bla, but the gentleman who did mine was so fantastic! If I could have felt my legs I would have gotten up and hugged the man. The nurses told me I was having a contraction and asked me how I felt. I looked her in the eye and said, if I'm having a contraction right now, I feel freaking amazing! Haha! - and the doc broke my bag it was right around 3:00am. We did eventually find out the reason I was in so much pain and experiencing back labor was because baby was faced posterior and sitting on my tail bone. We decided we had better call our family and let them know we would be having a baby sometime. The Nelson's came up immediately, I told my dad to wait it out a little bit, and I don't think my mom was too far behind the Nelson's. Scott and I were absolutley exhausted at this point, so we told the nurses to keep the family in the waiting room and we slept till about 7. And by slept, I mean get checked, have your blood pressure taken, etc... So really I didn't get too much sleep.

 At some point, I can't really even tell you when, I started to level out and nothing was happening. So I had to get hooked up to Pitocin. Again, everyone has their opinions on everything and I'd heard horror stories about the drug, but to be honest, I did fine on it. It helped get thing up and moving again and I quickly started to dilate. We let the family come in the room and hang out with us around 7am, Saturday morning; it was an interesting atmosphere. The grandparents were so anxious. I was so tired, still, and so was Scott. But the two of us were just as anxious and scared, excited, you name it we were feeling it.

During the night, the nurses had called my OB and he was amazing enough to come up, on his off day, and check me. Well just before 9am he said the words we'd be waiting to hear 'lets start pushing' and the family headed to the waiting room. Scott and I both started crying. I think mine was out of fear and I think Scott was excited. A funny note, he didn't know how long I would take, so he told the nurses not to start me till he went to the bathroom! HA!

Well, pushing was the hardest part out of my entire 9 months of pregnancy. I pushed for 2 HOURS and nothing happened. Well, besides getting physically ill again, and puking my guts out. They gave me Zofran for the nausea, which helped a ton, except it made it extra sleepy. I was literally falling asleep inbetween contractions because I just coudn't do it anymore. Dr. Jones came in, I think around around 10:45am, because our sons heart rate had been falling, he wasn't in total distress, but was getting there becuase he'd been in the birth canal for so long. Dr. Jones proceeded to tell Scott and I they needed to use assistance, forceps, to get him out. I really didn't like the idea, but Scott told me that for the last 30-45 minutes, baby had gone no where and basically all my pushing had been for nothing. So we agreed and Dr. Jones suited up. I remember inbetween pushes I heard Scott start to sob and the nurses started saying something, I really don't remember what because all I heard were Scott's sobs and I knew baby was here and I started bawling. I still had one or two more pushes before he was completely out and on my chest.

At 10:58am our sweet baby graced us with his presence. I have never felt so much love in my entire life. He came out with dark hair, not too much, and beautiful blue eyes. And the boy has a set of lungs on him! Ha. I remember thinking at the time they took him to get cleaned up and weighed, why are you taking him already?! He just got here! No you can't have him. Scott went over to the little station and took pictures and comforted him while they did their tests and what not. I, obviously, stayed put. Ryker was a big baby - 8lbs 5oz and 21.5 inches long - I am not a big girl. I'll spare you all the details, but between the forceps and him, it did some damage. I almost died when I saw his weight and length come across the screen. I kept thinking, that's not my kid. That's WAY too big to have came out of me. Uh no, he's just a big boy.

When they brought him back over to me, I don't think I'd stopped crying at that point, he was still a little bit upset so I started talking to him. It's completely amazing to me how he settled down at the sound of my voice. Just thinking of it, still, makes me get so emotional! We didn't immediately let our family in, we thought it was important we got to spend the first little while with just the three of us and I also wanted to nurse him. Scott was such a trooper, he was right in there helping me nurse him; positioning Ryker's head, helping my totally numb lower body get comfortable, getting me water. He was amazing. Finally we figured we had better let them in, and it was like a herd of elephants when we did. I don't even remember who held him first, but they were all basically standing in line like, okay it's been 5 minutes now it's my turn! Haha.

 The day seemed so long; between family being there, friends coming up to visit, doctors and nurses coming in to torture you... All I wanted to do was sleep and hold our son. I just kept looking at him thinking, you are mine. You are really my son. And feeling so overwhelmed like, can I do this? Can we give this baby boy the best life? How could I ever love something as much as I love you? I kept telling Scott, this is the best thing we have ever done. Everything in the past, is just that, in the past. Speaking of Scott, he jumped to that boys rescue every time he let out a noise. I didn't have to change a single dirty diaper while in the hospital. Every time they took Ryker out of the room, Scott went with. He helped bathe him, was there when he had shots or tests. He is such an amazing father. His eyes light up any time he looks at Ryker. My sometimes hardened heart has completely turned to mush over this babe.

We were discharged form the hospital on Sunday, August 19th around 12:30pm. I was so excited to get home to my own bed, but so afraid that we were taking our baby home. No more was it just us and the dogs.. All of a sudden we had a new passenger. The hell of my delivery was felt the entire way home, there was absolutely no comfortable way to sit, so the 30+ minutes drive was awful. We stopped at my moms to pick up the boys before we went home. We decided we wouldn't introduce them to Ryker until we were in our own home. I'd had the carseat in the car awhile before Ryker was born, so that really was no shock to them, but every once in a while Ryker would make a noise and both of the boys ears would perk up. Once we got home, we sat Ryker in his carseat in the middle of the living room and brought the boys in. The sniffed him, the seat, us and just kind of gave everything a once over and that was it. There was no barking, there was no growling. They just sniffed and left. To be honest, I think they were more happy to see us since it'd been a couple days.

 The first 2 nights home were hell. Complete hell. I had wondered why I left the hospital so soon. Sunday night and Monday night all Ryker did was scream and scream and scream... I kept nursing him and he was still so upset. Nothing Scott or I did would calm him down. He would basically work himself up so much, he would just crash from exhaustion. By Monday night, I couldn't handle the screaming. I called up to the nursery, bawling myself, and asked what was wrong with my son. Or was it me.. The nurse suggested by the sounds of his cries that he was hungry so give him an ounce of formula and see if that doesn't do the trick. I fed him, and he stopped crying. Just like that. I think we slept for 3 solid hours and I'd never been so happy for sleep in my life. We took him to his 2-day check up on Tuesday morning. Well, the problem... He was pretty much starved. He had lost over 10% of his body weight. I was devastated. The one thing he needed from me, I couldn't give him. I just wasn't producing anything and my milk was not coming in. Dr. S, Ryk's pediatrician, made us an appointment with a lactation specialist and we went back up to the hospital. I felt like the worst mother. It was all I could do to keep myself from crying. We got to the hospital and they checked both me and Ryker out - he was latching great, sucking great.. It was just the no milk causing problems.

It took almost a week for it to finally come in. Because Ryker had lost so much weight, we had to come in every day and do weight checks to make sure he was coming back up. Honestly, the worst week of my life. I really felt like in those 7 days, I had failed my son as a mother. People can tell you till they are blue in the face, but breast feeding is not easy. There are so many factors that go into it; you, your body, your baby, your babys body... Luckily, I am happy to report all is well now. There have been a few minor things, puking/spitting up, but nothing major. Thank goodness. Today is Oct. 2, I think I started this the end of September sometime, and Ryk baby is now 6w 4d old. He is doing fabulous. We got over the hurdle of circumcision (awful!!) and our sweet baby picked up his first cold at 5 weeks old. The first time we'd taken him out around people. I was so mad. And it only added fuel to my hate fire when I picked it up from him! Ha. Never going out in public again I tell ya! He has found his tongue and his voice. He's been smiling for a few weeks now and making funny little noises when he's happy. Nothing makes my day more than talking to him and him lighting up with a huge smile. He is the sweetest. I really can't imagine our life without him. Days are hard sometimes, don't get me wrong, but he is the best thing to happen to us. Someone just decided to wake up, so when I get him back down for a nap I'll post pictures of this baby bird!

By the way, I'm really going to be going private. My account was hacked from Afghanistan (uh, no thanks) and now that I've got Ryk... Well, I just don't wanna chance it! So make sure you leave me your email addresses please!